TREAT YOUR PARTNER BETTER THAN YOUR BEST FRIEND

I was talking to a friend about this rule the other day and she
disagreed with me emphatically. She said you had to treat your friends
better because you knew them better and you owed them more loyalty. I
then went on to talk to another friend and she said that wasn't the
case. You treated your partner better because you knew them less well.
Intriguing. My point is you should treat your partner better than your
friends because your partner is both lover and friend. And idieally
BEST friend. If they're not, then who is? And why? Is it because they
are the opposite sex and you need a same-sex best friend? Is it
because you don't see a lover as a friend? (If you do answer yes to
this, what do you see your partner as ...what is their role or
function in being your partner?). Again all this is about being
conscious. Treating your partner better than your best friend means
you have given it some thought and made a conscious decision to do so
- or not if it's the case. I would have thought treating your partner
better than your best friend would have been a given. This means not
interfering, respecting their privacy, treating them like independent
grown-ups. You only have to look around to see couples who treat each
other like small children, nagging, scolding, arguing, criticizing,
nit-picking. They wouldn't do it with their friends, so why do they do
it with the one person who is supposed to mean heaven and earth to
them? I'll give you an example. You are a passenger in a car being
driven by a friend. They make a foolish error (though not a dangerous
one). You would probably start teasing and laugh a lot. Now imagine
the same scenario but with your partner who has messed up. Do you: 1.
Make them feel very small? 2. Not let them forget it in a long while?
3. Tell everyone else? 4. Take over the driving for a while on the
grounds they're not to be trusted? 5. Treat them the same as you would
a friend and laugh a lot?
Hopefully the last one, but watch other couples in similar situations
and see what they do.